The "One and Done" Debaucle

Well, I would be lying if I said that this post is not something I struggle with.  I would also be lying if I didn't get at least 4 to 10 comments on this topic per month.  The ole One and Done scenario.  One child.  Two parents.  A family of three.  This type of family seems very (a) disturbing, (b) ridiculous, (c) selfish, or (d) a cop out to many people.  I will preface this post by saying (again), that just because I don't want tons of kids, I do fully support and celebrate with those of you who do!

When R and I first got married, he totally wanted kids at some point and I wasn't really sure whether I did or not.  From the ages of 22 to 26, the only rear end I ever wanted to wipe was my own.  I'm not really a huge "baby" person.  I did not babysit very much as a teen.  I do not insist upon holding and sniffing every infant I see.  If I smell "odors" coming from said infants, I do not have much of a filter when it comes to the look on my face once the smell reaches my nostrils.  So, needless to say, I was kinda on the fence about motherhood.  Well, R and I kicked the "growing our family" ball around the yard a time or two and I began to pray.  I asked the Lord to give me a desire for a baby.  WARNING:  If you ask the Lord to give you something like this, BE PREPARED!  He gives it to you in spades!

So I was bitten with the baby bug around the same time that we were told due to my health, I needed to give getting pregnant some time in order to get myself as healthy as possible.  Well, we got right on that.  I got an insulin pump in preparation (before the baby bug even bit) and I began a healthier lifestyle that included more exercise.  So we were on the right track with my diabetes and then I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome).  The Dr.'s last words to me on my way out the door of his office were:  "When you're ready to get pregnant, come in and we will start fertility treatments."  SAY WHAT?!!  Well, of course in dramatic fashion, I call R, bawling.  I had visions of John and Kate plus 8 running through my head and I was freaking out.  So R, in his non-dramatic fashion, calmly says, we'll deal with it when the time comes.  So I hang up with him and call my dear friend who is an NP.  She says in her non-dramatic fashion, that my first cycle off of the pill would be the most likely for us to get pregnant without help.  Well, I took that little tidbit and ran to the Lord with it.  We started praying that if this was the time (even though we had not been cleared on the diabetes front), then we were on board with His plan for our family.

Nine weeks later, we got a positive pregnancy test and were ecstatic!!!!!  Pregnancy was not bowl of cherries for me (sick for 8 months with a slight addiction to anti-nausea meds :) ).  In fact, I feel I was completely misled by those who told me that you would forget all about the pain and discomfort of pregnancy and labor once you saw the baby.  LIE!!!  Not true for me at all.  As I sit here typing this with almost 4 year old sitting behind me, I can VIVIDLY remember every wave of nausea, drop in blood pressure and blood sugar, fainting and dizzy spell and migraine that came down that 9 month long pike.  However, J is exactly what I wanted and didn't even know it.  He is wonderful and terifying at the same time.  I have learned more about the Father through my son than I thought possible.  What a blessing this child is to R and to me.

Now,  ever since I left Wadley Regional Medical Center in Texarkana, TX the question I am most often asked is:  "When are you going to have another one?"  REALLY?!!  The answer Emily is always prepared to give is:  "We're not.  I am satisfied with the one I have and don't want anymore."  But the reality is, the Lord is in control of this situation.  If He wants us to have another baby, I trust Him to give me just as much desire to have another baby as He did for the first one.  And even though I very openly run my big mouth about being completely done with having babies and that if I had another one they would have to commit me to a mental ward, I love God more than I love me (at least that's what I want) and I will do what He says happily.  I am also more than satisfied with the family of three He has allowed me to be a part of.  I feel so content and happy with where we are and where we are going. 

So, is this issue closed?  Not until menopause for me I suppose...but as of right now, at this hour, we are a solid family of three holding in the zone defense style of discipline and loving every minute of it!  Until next time...